My wonderful boyfriend decided to come home on Friday to surprise me. :) I was so excited to see him! I LOVE every second I get to spend with him. I always think of that one expression "Make every second count". I think we do. He came over Saturday and we spent time together again. We watched Saw VI together. Sunday before he left, he came over, had dinner with my family, and we spent time again again.<---My weekend doesn't sound like much, but I LOVE it when I get to see my boyfriend. Even if it's only for a few hours.
I love the feeling when you're in the arms of someone that truly do love and are in love with. It's a different feeling than with just some other person. He kept on bringing up like "Wow, you really are in love with me. I can tell it in your eyes, the way you hold me, and the way you touch me." Of course. Honestly, I never used to see myself EVER being in love with anyone. I was going through old posts a few weeks ago and stumbled across one that was entitled "What is Love?" and in comparison to my thoughts on love today and from the past, I've changed so much. I've matured and I can actually say that I KNOW what love is. And to me, love is being able to turn to your Significant Other anytime, anyday and them always being there for you, putting in as much effort into the relationship as the other person, being silly with each other & not caring, and respecting and trusting each other. I'm so much more hopeful today than I was a few years ago. I had nothing to be hopeful for back then, but now I have something to look forward to. Our future.
I'm actually super flattered right now because one of my friend's Josh asked me to help him with a surprise for his girlfriend Erica. Then we decided that it should be a surprise for James too. They have no idea, but it's about to be amazing I think. It's gonna be super sweet. :)
Alright so seriously...This week has been kind of shitty. I've been kinda down lately even though I don't really seem like it. I'm trying to control my outrageous emotional self because I hate fighting with my S.O. like forreal. I think fighting is a waste of time, yet it happens more often than I would like it to happen (which is not at all). I know it's healthy in relationships, but damn. I feel like everything's kind of like a test. Like a test of love, to see if we can get through and be strong. I know we will get through it and I know there's gonna be hard times, but I'm never going to give up. It's going to get better. This distance stuff honestly sucks. But I think if he was here I wouldn't be focused on school at all. I want him here with me, but right now I think this is good. So even though I complain about it I think it's good for us. Also, I can't believe how much I've changed since last year. Last year I was the MOST BITTER person about love. I had no hope for it all. Then he changed me. I have hope now. For a lot of things.
To my S.O.: I know I'm a pain in the ass sometimes, and sensitive and emotional. Please don't give up on me ever. Like you promised. Not gonna lie, I think my world would come shattering down, if you did. Everyone leaves...Thank you for sticking with me and I know we're gonna make it. I'm SO sure about it. I've never been this sure about anything in my life before. I know we get on each other's nerves sometimes, but I think true love is loving each other when we're at the worst of times, regardless of how mad we make each other. You've changed me into a better person. Sometimes I get a little scared because I'm still not really used to someone treating me as good as you. I took a chance on you and it was the best chance I've ever taken. And I'm ready to take more chances with you. I trust you so much and I'm giving and will continue to give you my all. I love you.
Moving on...
Okay a bunch of my friends from the summer have been soooo shady. That's pretty much all I've got to say about that. I think I need to find some new friends that aren't shady. Shady, shady, shady, shady. I can't take it.
School's getting pretty intense for me right now. I mean I don't have difficult classes at all, but damn. College algebra is horrible. I understand what's going on and what not, but I don't appreciate the 2398209829384 homework problems they expect us to do. I love CJUS. Religions is great...yay for sucking up to my prof. I'm not even trying.
Jasmine's baby is due in about a month. I'm so excited for her! I'm going to be an aunt! :) I remember freshman year we used to be SO close! It all changed when one of my friends started hating on her. I was a follower back then so we ended up not talking for the longest time (3 years to be exact). I'm glad that we put that aside and are really close again. I wanted to be there for her because I know it's difficult to be in a situation like hers alone. I'm about to be the best aunt. Ever. I went to child birth preparation class for this whole month every Monday. I learned a lot and can't wait til the little princess arrives. The baby shower is next Saturday so I've gotta find some baby shower games for everyone to play.
This past week and a half has been crazy because I was trying to finish up James' Valentines day gift. I finally finished the pages of the dictionary. Yes I gave him a dictionary. Not just any dictionary. There was some meaning. I went through in red pen (red's his favorite color & valentinesy I guess) and circled, marked, underlined, wrote in things that reminded me of him, things that he's taught me, and my feelings and what not. I couldn't wait to give that to him so I gave it to him last night. He said he loved it. Success!
I also got him a Packers jersey. I waited to give that to him though until today.
Today James was being all tricky and what not. Asking for my friends phone numbers and what not. I had no idea what to expect really so I was just going with it. I tried not to ask a lot of questions. Fail. I tried not to be curious. Fail. Time went by fast though and FINALLY I got a phone call from him telling me to be ready in 15 minutes. He rang the doorbell, but I was in the bathroom washing my hands when I heard it, so I guess mom let him in. Thanks mom! Anyways, when I saw him he was telling me to go downstairs. Then he told me to close my eyes as he guided me across the room. He told me to open my eyes. I ended up staring face to face with a bouquet of flowers and a large box of chocolates. :) SOOOOO SWEET. I love my boyfriend. Not gonna lie it was kind of an emotional moment for me, just because no one's ever done that for me before. I gave him his second present, the Packers jersey. He was so cute when he opened it!
Chocolate and flowers wasn't it though. He had more coming my way. When we were getting ready to go out to his car he told me that I have to watch out where I sit because I might crush someone. Hella? I was confused. So we go out to his car. He pulls it up so I can get in because of all the snow. He got out of the car, opened up my door like a gentleman :) & then I saw this cute little bear sitting on the seat.
Then we went out to dinner at Matsu Sushi downtown in the Old Market. I love that place. It's my favorite. After dinner we walked back to the car. He opened up the door for me again. I got in and sat down like I usually do. He knelt down and grabbed something from under the seat. I thought he was going to kiss me. Haha. Hella? I was wrong. He pulled out a little box with a bow on it. He asked me to make a promise to commit myself to him. And I did. I've never felt like this before. Like forreal. The way James makes me feel is indescribable. It's basically all of the good words in the dictionary. Haha.
He dropped me off at my house and opened the door for me again. Walked me to my door. I love those moments. They're my very favorite. Not the saying goodbye part but I can always feel all of the emotion going into it.
Mom and I talked when I got home. She asked me "Is this the happiest Valentines day you've ever had?!" and of course I said yes. It really was amazing. I'm so blessed to have a boyfriend that cares as much as he does. The other day she was telling me about how Dad and her don't really celebrate Valentines. They go out but it's not that big for them. She thinks that there shouldn't just be one day out of the year to express how much you love someone. It should be every day of the year. I agree. Everyday should be like Valentines day. :)
I didn't think the last post posted. So whatever. It's all good. I really want to get back into blogging just because this used to be my way of venting and getting things out that needed to get out of my head or even stay in my head -- the good and the bad memories. Let's just start off with --- the past few months have been the best months ever.
In November, I was living up the single life, just kickin it with my girls and what not. As you may or may not have known already, I've been single since my freshman year in high school. I kind of gave up on relationships and didn't really care. To me all guys were the same. I wasn't even looking for anyone and you know what they say...When you don't look for anything, something good will happen to you. I believe it now. About two weeks into November, I went out with them one night to someone's house and hung out there for a little bit. We pretty much knew each other and a few other guys. I saw this guy there and he was super good looking. I didn't really think anything of it because he looked like he coulda been one of THOSE guys. You know? The kind that are douches. Well anyways we ended up dippin out of that house an hour later because we got bored. I was just talkin with my girls and texting the night away. The guy never got up to talk to me or anything. Well when we left, I was talkin to my girls tryin to see who that was and what not. They knew that his names James, and they knew of him, but never really talked to him before. So I was cool with that. I just left it at that. Since he didn't even talk to me there I was for sure that he would never talk to me and we would never cross paths again. (Weird, because we've both been in Bellevue for a long time and that was the first time we've seen each other). We've apparently been friends on facebook and myspace for a super long time and we never talked on there at all. We ended up talking during the week and he asked me out on a date for that upcoming Friday. I wasn't too sure about it at first. I was actually really nervous because no one's really taken me out on a date before. It was just all really new for me. I decided to take a chance and just give him a try. Friday rolled around and we ended up going to get milkshakes and talk for a little bit before we went to see Couples Retreat (which btw is so funny!). He did a lot of the talking because I was super shy and a little bit on the quiet side (I know I know). So anyways we went to the movie and it was fun. Towards the end of the movie we ended up holding hands which was the sweetest thing ever. It wasn't like regular hand holding...It felt different. Like there was a purpose. Not gonna lie. Towards the end of the date I was getting kind of scared just because I started to feel something. After the movie we drove around for a bit and just talked at Bellevue East in the parking lot. It was sweet and what not. He dropped me off at home, walked me too my door, and told me he had a great time and what not. <---First time any guys ever walked me to my door before. I thought it went super well although I had my awkward silences. I was just nervous and I never had a guy treat me the way he did. We ended up going out to eat and to the Old Market with some of my friends. Then we went to his best friend's house and just kicked it there for a little bit. He asked me to be his girlfriend and I was just certain that he was forreal. I said yes and we've been dating since November 21, 2009. James is about 75 miles away from me and usually never used to come home on the weekends but started coming home to see me. He met a majority of my extended family at my Thanksgiving party and the aunties all love him. They all think he's sooo good looking. Win. Definitely started loving him. That pretty much wraps up November.
In December, we celebrated our one month a little early and I left for New Jersey from the 19th-27th. I always love going home to New Jersey because I never get to see that side of the family too often. It was fun though we went around NYC a lot. I also got to see Mary and I was stoked about that. The last time I saw her was for Thanksgiving break. James & I talked on the phone a lot while I was gone. One day I'll take him with me. We thought we were gonna have to miss our connecting flight back to Omaha but we didn't. My prince charming picked Adrienne & I up from the air port. I got to hang out with him for a little bit and loved being back in his arms. For New Years Eve we all went to my auntie Beth's house. I brought James with me and he met more of the aunties there. Good times good times.
I started out January with a New Years kiss from James and it was a really good start to my year. James has been MIA because he's been at college doin his wrestling thing. It's all good because we still get to talk and what not. We usually either talk on the phone, facebook, or skype. I've definitely fallen more in love with him over these past few months. Maybe it sounds like it was fast, they say that love never has a time limit. A few weeks ago my family and I went to watch him wrestle in York. It was fun just watching him and supporting him. I love seeing him in person > seeing him over skype. I love being in his arms. You know. Well anyways, I haven't seen him since then but it's all good.
I can't believe it's February already. Like forreal? We're 2 weeks away from our 3 months. I can't believe it! Next Sunday is Valentine's day and I'm pretty stoked about it because I've never in my life had a Valentine before. I just had those super annoying people in classes that used to HAVE to give me valentines. But whatever...This should be an experience. My gift for him is super cheesy and part manly at the same time. I would give you a hint or even show you if I knew for sure that he wouldn't see this blog.
Hope all is well with you.
For your viewing pleasure:
What I really want for Valentine's day is for James to draw me a picture. I just think it'd be the sweetest thing ever. Hopefully he remembers :)
